Column: Hey Buffy!

Hey Buffy,
I was just wondering how you were doing, after yet another apocalypse. I mean, don’t you ever get tired of all the vamps that are out there to bite you? (Although one cannot really blame them, you just have the perfect neck for it…) Well, we never get enough of you, so I guess I am saying we kind of miss you right now. Primetime television isn’t the same without the vamp-ass-kicking blond chick that makes even dead hearts beat faster. I mean let’s face it: what is there to look forward to since all access to Sunnydale is closed off. (And what the fuck is Joss doing nowadays anyway?? Fucking Fire Flights or something?) What is there to talk about now there are no more evils to fight, no more vamps to dust and no Willows, Taras, Faiths, Dawns and Kennedies to drool over? You thought your life was tough, well, just think about a world without the Scoobies – now that’s tough.

I just wish we could walk down Sunnydale’s main street one more time, get a latte next to the magic box… hang out at the Bronze en get real drunk while listening to Oss’ band (the only way to endure their music is to get really drunk anyway… but who ca-res…). Or have one of those nice long conversations while patrolling. Ah well, I guess it wasn’t meant to be… I mean, I guess I am not dead enough for you. Uhm, I’m sorry that wasn’t really fair, now was it? Just having a really though time here…But one can-not help wondering, while waking up in the morning, and noticing there is still a world because you saved the damn thing once again, what’s happening in your life. Does Giles still has morning breath before his first coffee (Sorry G.) and is Willow finally capable having an orgasm without floating around? (You know how those witches can get.) And what about our Xander… the heart of the team, the man of men.. the carpenter with wit..Okay, I am feeling kind of nostalgic, and will stop with this silly nonsense. Just wanted to say that people over here are thinking about you. Hope everything worked out with Spike, and if not, there is always Andrew… (Just kidding, tell him I said hi… and thank him for the Star Wars collectors Pyjama’s: they are very comfy.)Take care, wherever you are. And if you ever need help staking a dead guy, you only need to holler.Love always,
One of the fans (who basically has no life now the fat lady has finished her song and the show of all shows is over).(Tas, deze was voor jou :-))